30 Comments
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Penny Radtke Adams's avatar

Thank you for posting this. I, too, grew up in a small town with mostly Republican people, although my parents did not voice their political views because they said they did not want to hurt their local business. However, my experience happened long before yours, since I am soon to be 79! And it took me much longer to find out who I really was politically and otherwise. In fact, it took four marriages! But I have been with number 4 for over 30 years, so I guess I learned some great lessons- the most important of which I believe is that I am totally a Democrat. My parents would (and did not) agree with my lifestyle. In fact, I remember my dad saying after my third divorce, "Why don't you just marry a nice German boy?!" They were both very prejudiced against anyone not of their race or religion. I applaud you for standing up for your beliefs and finding out early who you really are. Stay strong! :-)

Ronda Cress's avatar

Thank you, Penny. It's so interesting how people develop and hold fast to prejudice and labels! Congrats on 30+ years, that's awesome!

Richard Murrietta's avatar

I like your substack so far. You seem like a very intelligent and compassionate person. Which I already assumed from you being married to Mary. I will start paying next month. Recovering from Xmas right now.

Ronda Cress's avatar

That's very kind, Richard. I'm glad you're enjoying it!

Janice Reinersman's avatar

I also grew up in a Republican family that assumed my sister and I would seamlessly

have the same beliefs as my family had for generations. As high school seniors,

each of us were asked to describe our ambition for the yearbook. Mine was "To gain

a liberal point of view." For years afterwards, that statement embarrassed me. Now,

I realize that was a bit confining an ambition as "liberal" these days exists on a wide

continuum. Social Democrat is a more accurate description of who I am as a citizen

and female human being.

Ronda Cress's avatar

The family dynamics aspect of our politics is so interesting. And how it can evolve. Thanks for sharing!

Heather Wynne-Phillips's avatar

Been there. Done that too. Grew up in a conservative evangelical family in the buckle if the Bible belt, Memphis TN. I also grew into my values that did not align with the meanness of the Republican party. Though I still embrace a more fiscally responsible mindset, the progressive ways feel much more compassionate and right. Later in life when I fell in love with a woman, my family basically disowned me. No regrets. Everyday I feel peaceful that the way of love and integrity should be our plumb line for living. Blessings to you and Mary and I look forward to hearing more of your story. Thank you for sharing!

Ronda Cress's avatar

Thank you for sharing, too, Heather! That sounds like quite a journey. I'm sorry your family rejected you. It's so sad and such a loss for them.

brokenallbroken's avatar

Thank you for talking to us about your journey. I think ending up left of our parents is a common narrative for us Gen X'ers. My parents (Democrats, but nevertheless) always told me "people get more conservative as they get older", but my political awakening has been exactly the opposite. My experiences in the world radicalized me to the liberal end of the spectrum, even as I wrestle with my own authoritarian tendencies. My brain just got snagged on liberal and liberty sharing a root word. Sometimes we find out our parents were actually right about something, and sometimes we end up freeing ourselves of their shackles binding us.

Ronda Cress's avatar

I completely agree.

Irene Marshall's avatar

Here in the UK, the expression is “when pigs fly”. I can’t remember what it was that led to it, but I once drew a flying pig, which I named “Pigasus”. It was appropriate at the time, and I hope it will be again soon.

Ronda Cress's avatar

We have that expression, too! "Pigasus" - love it! I hope donkeys and pigs fly again soon, too. I think they're already starting to!

Irene Marshall's avatar

I hope so. If I can locate the artwork (!) I’ll share it. I think I still have it……..somewhere.

Irene Marshall's avatar

Found the painting. It’s now my profile picture.

Ronda Cress's avatar

That's amazing! It's really good!

Irene Marshall's avatar

Thank you. I must have done that 20 years ago. Reason, long forgotten, but probably to do with work.

Rebecca Gunn's avatar

You described perfectly my own small town Minnesota upbringing.

Ronda Cress's avatar

I had a feeling many others could relate to this!

Bob Mack's avatar

Pretty cool, a great read. My Dad was very liberal minded. He was the first grownup I recall being opposed to the Vietnam war. One night, while playing poker with some neighbors he expressed his disdain for the war. Our neighbor Ed, a retired U. S Marine, knocked his chips over and left our home. I ran into Ed 35 years later and he told me he regretted that and losing his friendship with my Dad. Ed looked me in the eye and said, "I was wrong, and I'm sorry.".

Ronda Cress's avatar

Thanks, Bob. I don't doubt that it took courage for your Dad to voice his opposition to the war. And kudos to Ed for admitting he was wrong and apologizing - that took courage, too.

Ronda Cress's avatar

Thanks, Bob. I don't doubt that it took courage for your Dad to voice his opposition to the war. And kudos to Ed for admitting he was wrong and apologizing - that took courage, too.

Lisa's avatar

I remember that rally too - not what was said but the awe and energy in that room. The way you’ve always stood firm in your beliefs is one of the many things I’ve always admired about you! Your writing is beautiful and I look forward to reading more.

Ronda Cress's avatar

Yes, we went together! Thanks for your kind words and your love and support over the years. 🩵🖤

freddiethek's avatar

Love your story! My father, racist that he was, always told my late sister and I that Republicans were all for the rich. Of course he was right! He lived thru Cooledge putting pot in every chicken or something like that.

Having said that; one year I accompanied him to vote. When we got out of the booth we had both voted for Jessie Jackson. He was a walking contradiction.

Look forward to part two.

Ronda Cress's avatar

Thank you! What an interesting turn by your father!

Charlotte Thompson's avatar

Ronda your story has some parallels that I recognize. My late mother was quite conservative, and I am the opposite of that. She liked Richard "Tricky Dick" Nixon. When Rich Little would impersonate him on tv, she was livid. I thought it was funny, but I kept quiet in her presence. All of us are different as we should be. However, I cannot understand how anyone can support the orange goon, as I call him. It is very obvious to me that he is senile and unfit to be president.

Stephanie Knouse's avatar

Enjoy hearing authors read their work! It adds depth and meaning, for me. I hope you’ll keep doing this& thank you… crucial subject to explore.

Ronda Cress's avatar

That's good feedback to have, Stephanie! Thank you!

Paula Harmon's avatar

Thank you for your post .

Still painful as it is with all that is going on in this country right now . Lately it matters not where you live .

I’ve had the displeasure of experiencing the same as many here have had in Ohio .

As a kid on vacation for the summer with my extended family. As an adult I went back to relocate my two aunts to New York even renting pods and an 18 wheeler was a hassle my cousin had a tee shirt with Kamala Harris photo on it. Proprietors would always say you’re not from around here . My nephew couldn’t understand why anyone would care I told him it was the shirt .

My aunts and I were relieved to be in New York though I had some fun and friends there I learned how to turn my dislike of that situation along with the current state of play into making a career change while studying .

I appreciate how you challenged your father in telling him how you voted and your party affiliation more importantly was what I believe the start of your life’s journey.

You didn’t compromise your values and beliefs and it hurt but not so much when it’s you and world around you.

Bob Mack's avatar

Hi Ronda, I asked Mary several times to change the contribution of $5 I made to be a one time contribution but got no response. I know you check and respond to your followers. I am subscribed to you both. When I contributed to Mary the default was to make it monthly and I missed that detail. I was just charged another $5 and would like it to be turned off. Can you ask Mary to fix it for me? I'd really appreciate that.